“What’s your cell phone number?” has got to be the most annoying question ever asked. How would I know? I never call it. Even if I did call it, I’d just go into my phone’s address book and tell the phone to dial the number for me. I know it’s listed in the phone’s memory somewhere, but I can never remember how to find it.
When someone asks me the number, I just call their cell phone and their cell phone will give them my number – as well as my name, my e-mail address, my address, my birthday, my wedding anniversary, my mother’s maiden name, my Social Security number and the numbers of a few hundred of my nearest and dearest friends. It’s all in my phone and my computer; who can remember all that stuff?
I have no memory for phone numbers anymore. My home phone remembers the last 50 callers by name and number for me, so it’s so easy just to scroll back a few numbers and hit “dial.” Why waste my precious brain space on that? My computer’s address book and calendar store all that information for me. Why should I try to hold all those numbers in my head? Now I can use all that extra brain space for Twitter messages and Facebook friends. Maybe not. I can’t remember them, either. What was I talking about? Oh yeah, memory. Funny story: I upgraded the software on my computer last week, and it erased my calendar. Ever since then, I have a nagging feeling that I’m always missing a doctor’s appointment or an important anniversary or someone’s birthday. I could look it up on my phone, but I’ve forgotten how.
You might think I’d be better off with an old-fashioned desk calendar and address book, but that’s the great thing about having a paperless office: no messy desk calendars and bulky Rolodexes. Writing things down is gone with the ... What do you call that stuff that blows? They made a movie out of it, remember? Never mind, I’ll Google it. Wind. That’s it! Writing things down is gone with the wind. See, I didn’t have to remember that or write it down. All I had to remember was Google, leaving space in my brain to remember the really important things like that thing Sue asked me to do this morning. Something about plants and water. Or was it plants and fire? Did she want me to put out her plants with water if they catch on fire? That must be it. She doesn’t have to worry. I won’t let her down.
