Dear Maggie,

I am so sick of you telling everyone to just look for the good things in people and ignore the bad stuff. What about really awful, horrible people? What about people in your life who just don’t deserve you being kind and positive and nice to them? I mean, if you’re nice to someone who treats you like dirt, aren’t you sort of letting them treat you that way? If you ignore all the awful stuff they do to you, doesn’t that give them permission to keep doing it? Where does justice and standing up for yourself and refusing to be a doormat come into this positive thinking stuff, anyway?

I ask because I have some nasty people in my life, people who are constantly asking for help but refusing to ever pay anything back or even to really appreciate all I do for them. If I say no, they’re furious. If I say yes, they just ask for even more. And they don’t deserve it. So am I supposed to ignore their bad habits and just keep giving them help all the time? I just don’t get it! Help!

Signed,

Fed Up with Moochers!

Dear Fed Up,

We create everything in our lives. So whoever you are currently interacting with, you attracted them to you. You brought them to you by your focus. If one person made you feel used, taken advantage of, and unappreciated, and you got upset about it, and mulled it over for a bit, you were actively creating more of the same. If you had let it go and gone about your business of feeling good, you wouldn’t have grown a crop of moochers from that one single seed somewhere in the past.