Dear Maggie,

For five long years, I’ve waited for my boyfriend to propose. When he finally did, it was the happiest day of my life. But now that my wedding day is almost here, I’m having doubts. We’re so different! I’m a vegetarian, and he likes meat. I enjoy country music, but he likes metal. I’m a liberal and he’s slightly right of center. I love cats, and he loves dogs. There are so many differences between us! How can we expect to be happy together when we’re total opposites in so many ways? Should I be re-thinking this? Is there any way to really be sure? I wish there was a quiz we could take that would tell us if we’ll make it or not, so I could be sure before the wedding! Help!

Signed,

Bride to Be, or Not to Be

Dear Bride,

Here’s the first thing. There’s no way to be sure of anything. Ever. You might be 100% sure of what you want today, and tomorrow, that might be something very different. We grow and change and evolve every day of our lives. That’s what life is about. So you’re never sure about tomorrow. The best you can do is be sure about today.

So here you are today. And you’re worrying about all the areas in which you two differ. Tell me, have those differences been a problem up to now? Have they caused a rift between you? Have they prevented your relationship from growing deeper or the two of you from enjoying each other? I don’t think they have, because here you are planning your wedding.

You’re not supposed to spend all your time with someone who agrees with you on everything, and thinks the same way you do all the time. (Otherwise, we’d all be content with just ourselves.) Besides, that would make you both extremely boring and eventually, quite closed minded. Ah, but being with someone who sees things from a different angle, now that keeps you interesting. It keeps your mind sharp, it makes you give your own opinions more thought, and helps you understand other points of view, even if you don’t agree with them.